4/28/2006 07:35:00 PM|W|P|Gabe|W|P|
REGIS: Gabe, there is one question I know that everyone in America would like to have answered.
GABE: Okay.
REGIS: What is the point of No Refunds Theatre Co.?
GABE: Oh, that's easy. We're a ramshackle assemblage of mad THEATRICAL ALCHEMISTS! You see, we take your average play, or idea, like a hunk of worthless wretched iron and we TRANSMUTE it into theatrical GOLD!
REGIS: I see, so you're kind of like King Midas?
GABE: Exactly, King Midas like a mutha$#%&*. Everything we touch becomes a precious metal of entertainment. If you could forge our plays into rings you could use them to get married.
REGIS: Really-
GABE: Oh, snap! Even better, If you could forge our plays into a ring it would be the ring of frigging power, sucka! Middle Earth would succumb to our shadow! Beware, THEATRICAL ALCHEMY is treacherous.
REGIS: LOTR represent! So you guys are an evil theatre company?
GABE: Oh, HELL Yeah! What did you think like we were all like ponies and rainbows? Shoot! We got the darkness, ya'll need to step back.
REGIS: Oh, okay.
GABE: No, fer real step back.
REGIS: Ha ha.
GABE: Whatchyou laughing at? I'll give you something to laugh at, take that! HEEYAH!
REGIS: Ah! My eye!
GABE: That's right, I tore your eye out, dude. Now watch this! TAADOOWW!!!
REGIS: Oh, you broke my leg!
GABE: I told you we's evil, ya'll thought I was lying, well deal with THIS! AAAATSSAAA!
REGIS: uuhhh...
GABE: That's right. You dead now.
CROWD: Hail Gabe, Regis at last is dead! He will be the new host with Kelly Ripa!
GABE: Shut up!
CROWD: Hail! Hail! Let's bring back Kathie Lee too!
GABE: NOOOOO!!!
(Gabe wakes up from his dream in his bed)
GABE: No!
GABE'S HOTTY: Gabe, what's wrong?
GABE: Oh God, I was having another dream about killing Regis...
GABE'S HOTTY: Oh, it's okay, baby, Regis is still alive.
GABE: Thank God!
The End.|W|P|114627338922745105|W|P|Theatrical Alchemy|W|P|gllanas@gmail.com4/26/2006 01:54:00 AM|W|P|Gabe|W|P|
Yo, so we have been throwing together some quality scenes for the big fundraiser. But the fundraiser isn't just about people coming to see our hilarious and inventive new material stolen from timeless classics, it's also a chance for people to network socially with people who can then become your myspace friends (by the way, be friends with KUNG FU HAMLET!). We'll probably open doors for the whole deal at about 7pm on Saturday, June 3rd, we'll try to sell you things for about an hour and solicit donations, and then at 8pm we'll raise the curtain on our theatrical histrionics, which will blow your feeble minds (more on the set list later), then we'll entertain you for several more hours with music, beverages (some of them alcoholic) and further attempts to take your money, which you will willingly hand over because of the aforementioned mind-blowing.
We've been trying to think about alternative forms of advertising the event, and it's been slow going. One of the new efforts we're going to pilot is the 1-inch rock buttons, we'll be able to get three designs and I've been working on a Kung Fu Hamlet design, a straight up No Refunds Design, and then the fly Project Twin Cities American Next Top Idol Search Contest design in anticipation of our coming Fringe Festival hunt for the greatest theatrical genius of our time...
I was going to put up the images of the button designs so far, but they seem to hate me and the colors are coming out all funky. so instead, please enjoy the image for the upcoming fringe show.
word.|W|P|114603971172344445|W|P|a fool and his money... that's our TARGET AUDIENCE!|W|P|gllanas@gmail.com4/20/2006 01:53:00 AM|W|P|Gabe|W|P|
so I was typing up the press release form letter, when I figured I should drop in some of the promo images. You might have noticed the little design I came up with in the previous post, with the dollar yin yang and all. I like it, and at first I'd wanted to do all the postcards in black and white to give it sort of that old-timey feel (you know, to capture the historical aspect of the whole thing). But several people thought maybe some color would be nice. I still wanted to avoid making it too busy, like the KFH poster, but I wanted there to be some more eye-catching elements. So anyway I started working on the image in photoshop. Let me just say to the good people at Adobe, photoshop is like crack. I am so lucky I didn't have this when I was a kid (actually, hours of honing my photoshop skills might have proven more professionally practical than my incomparable Ninja Gaiden acumen...)
In any case, I did two majorly different sort of designs, and I'm debating between the two of them. I don't mind admitting that I am liking the simpler of the two, the one with the greenbacks in the background is a little busier than I would like, and I just couldn't find a decent color for the font. I've also tinkered with the bevel and emboss on the yin yang, but I like that it has depth. I also like how pronounced the flames make it, but that might be outweighed by the subtle cleverness of the dollars in the other yin yang. The only other thing I was thinking about adding was some curtains or theatre masks or something visual to impart to the viewer that this is a theatrical event. I just don't know if the word "Theatre" is going to cut it. I also might change the textured black background on the orange letter one.
In any case, I'm looking for a little feedback, cause it's almost two and I have to finish drafting the press release and I'm at a bit of an impasse.
So, Whaddya Think?|W|P|114551688913886720|W|P|thinking too much|W|P|gllanas@gmail.com4/21/2006 04:26:13 PM|W|P|P|W|P|I like the black background4/21/2006 05:38:51 PM|W|P|MD|W|P|I think there should be a big shot of Gabe wearing his KFH outfit on the front.
That would bring the crowds in :)4/24/2006 01:50:36 PM|W|P|Gabe|W|P|well, we tried the one with me in costume, but the room got so steaming hot that all the camera lenses fogged over and none of the pics came out.
Seriously people, control yourselves. there's plenty of gabe to go around...4/12/2006 01:17:00 AM|W|P|Gabe|W|P|
Hey Everybody!
Saturday June 3rd at 8pm is going to be the official date of our fundraiser featuring the GREAT MOMENTS IN KUNG FU THEATRE HISTORY! so mark those calendars!
We've already seen drafts of those Great Moments from several members of the Axis of Evil Arists, including: Jerome Yorke (brutalizing Arthur Miller), Ryan Kathmann (singlehandedly toppling Sophocles), Matt Dawson (is a huge nerd), and yours truly. My brother, the Infamous Ian Llanas might be even scratching out a secret animated project for the event that is sure to knock your frigging nasty, crusty, yellow socks off.
Anticipate this event. It is a once in a lifetime opportunity to see the original Kung Fu Theatre Maniacs utterly annihilating thousands of years of theatrical tradition with a single night of hubristic pageantry!
And don't forget your wallet. The more money you give us, the more likely we are to totally blow your pasty, cobwebbed mind.
YEAH, KID!|W|P|114482393346179103|W|P|June 3rd: Kung Fundraiser!|W|P|gllanas@gmail.com
GABE: Oh, HELL Yeah! What did you think like we were all like ponies and rainbows? Shoot! We got the darkness, ya'll need to step back.
REGIS: Oh, okay.
GABE: No, fer real step back.
REGIS: Ha ha.
GABE: Whatchyou laughing at? I'll give you something to laugh at, take that! HEEYAH!
REGIS: Ah! My eye!
GABE: That's right, I tore your eye out, dude. Now watch this! TAADOOWW!!!
REGIS: Oh, you broke my leg!
GABE: I told you we's evil, ya'll thought I was lying, well deal with THIS! AAAATSSAAA!
REGIS: uuhhh...
GABE: That's right. You dead now.
CROWD: Hail Gabe, Regis at last is dead! He will be the new host with Kelly Ripa!
GABE: Shut up!
CROWD: Hail! Hail! Let's bring back Kathie Lee too!
GABE: NOOOOO!!!
(Gabe wakes up from his dream in his bed)
GABE: No!
GABE'S HOTTY: Gabe, what's wrong?
GABE: Oh God, I was having another dream about killing Regis...
GABE'S HOTTY: Oh, it's okay, baby, Regis is still alive.
GABE: Thank God!
The End.|W|P|114627338922745105|W|P|Theatrical Alchemy|W|P|gllanas@gmail.com
Yo, so we have been throwing together some quality scenes for the big fundraiser. But the fundraiser isn't just about people coming to see our hilarious and inventive new material stolen from timeless classics, it's also a chance for people to network socially with people who can then become your myspace friends (by the way, be friends with KUNG FU HAMLET!). We'll probably open doors for the whole deal at about 7pm on Saturday, June 3rd, we'll try to sell you things for about an hour and solicit donations, and then at 8pm we'll raise the curtain on our theatrical histrionics, which will blow your feeble minds (more on the set list later), then we'll entertain you for several more hours with music, beverages (some of them alcoholic) and further attempts to take your money, which you will willingly hand over because of the aforementioned mind-blowing.
We've been trying to think about alternative forms of advertising the event, and it's been slow going. One of the new efforts we're going to pilot is the 1-inch rock buttons, we'll be able to get three designs and I've been working on a Kung Fu Hamlet design, a straight up No Refunds Design, and then the fly Project Twin Cities American Next Top Idol Search Contest design in anticipation of our coming Fringe Festival hunt for the greatest theatrical genius of our time...
I was going to put up the images of the button designs so far, but they seem to hate me and the colors are coming out all funky. so instead, please enjoy the image for the upcoming fringe show.
word.|W|P|114603971172344445|W|P|a fool and his money... that's our TARGET AUDIENCE!|W|P|gllanas@gmail.com
so I was typing up the press release form letter, when I figured I should drop in some of the promo images. You might have noticed the little design I came up with in the previous post, with the dollar yin yang and all. I like it, and at first I'd wanted to do all the postcards in black and white to give it sort of that old-timey feel (you know, to capture the historical aspect of the whole thing). But several people thought maybe some color would be nice. I still wanted to avoid making it too busy, like the KFH poster, but I wanted there to be some more eye-catching elements. So anyway I started working on the image in photoshop. Let me just say to the good people at Adobe, photoshop is like crack. I am so lucky I didn't have this when I was a kid (actually, hours of honing my photoshop skills might have proven more professionally practical than my incomparable Ninja Gaiden acumen...)
In any case, I did two majorly different sort of designs, and I'm debating between the two of them. I don't mind admitting that I am liking the simpler of the two, the one with the greenbacks in the background is a little busier than I would like, and I just couldn't find a decent color for the font. I've also tinkered with the bevel and emboss on the yin yang, but I like that it has depth. I also like how pronounced the flames make it, but that might be outweighed by the subtle cleverness of the dollars in the other yin yang. The only other thing I was thinking about adding was some curtains or theatre masks or something visual to impart to the viewer that this is a theatrical event. I just don't know if the word "Theatre" is going to cut it. I also might change the textured black background on the orange letter one.
In any case, I'm looking for a little feedback, cause it's almost two and I have to finish drafting the press release and I'm at a bit of an impasse.
So, Whaddya Think?|W|P|114551688913886720|W|P|thinking too much|W|P|gllanas@gmail.com
Hey Everybody!
Saturday June 3rd at 8pm is going to be the official date of our fundraiser featuring the GREAT MOMENTS IN KUNG FU THEATRE HISTORY! so mark those calendars!
We've already seen drafts of those Great Moments from several members of the Axis of Evil Arists, including: Jerome Yorke (brutalizing Arthur Miller), Ryan Kathmann (singlehandedly toppling Sophocles), Matt Dawson (is a huge nerd), and yours truly. My brother, the Infamous Ian Llanas might be even scratching out a secret animated project for the event that is sure to knock your frigging nasty, crusty, yellow socks off.
Anticipate this event. It is a once in a lifetime opportunity to see the original Kung Fu Theatre Maniacs utterly annihilating thousands of years of theatrical tradition with a single night of hubristic pageantry!
And don't forget your wallet. The more money you give us, the more likely we are to totally blow your pasty, cobwebbed mind.
YEAH, KID!|W|P|114482393346179103|W|P|June 3rd: Kung Fundraiser!|W|P|gllanas@gmail.com